Is *NOT* wearing any pants the new black?

it has come to my attention that there are quite a few women walking around without pants.  in fact, i've noticed this phenomenon 5 times in the last 2 weeks.  i'm not mistaking leggings, or jeggings, or otherwise really-tight-pants-that-only-a-streetwalker-would-wear for no pants.  these women literally had NO PANTS.  

i can't imagine they're actually stupid enough to not know the difference between tights and pants, but tights CANNOT be worn as pants.  i don't care how "super opaque" they claim to be, or how thick they are.....honey, they ain't opaque enough.  in the most recent case, a young lady was wearing a very short dress; the problem is, she was about 6 feet tall, so the dress was actually like a long t-shirt.  it did not cover her butt, and ALL she had on underneath were black tights and underwear.  when i can see what kind of undies you prefer, that's NO PANTS.  when a passing little kid yells out, "Mommy, that lady's not wearing any pants!", that's NO PANTS.  when your camel toe is peeking out the front of your tunic/not-a-dress, that's NO PANTS.

i was at a loss for words.  you already know that i'm not a lover of yoga pants or leggings (unless you're under 18 or have the body of Heidi Klum), but apparently i've been ranting about the wrong folks.  these no pants folks, now THESE are the folks i need to be targeting.  stay warm, and know that you'll be warmer than all the ladies (i use that term loosely) with no pants.

xoxo and all that sappy crap,

mrs. awesome