This is where I digress a little, but I get REALLY tired of being asked this question.

It's true.

My kids are blissfully unaware of the latest TV show, or current music, or the 
newest phone app. They don't know how to be cool, or exclude other kids, or what a clique is. They don't spend time surfing the internet or texting their friends. They don't know if their clothes are from the "right" stores, or what it means to have possessions as status symbols.

Here's what they do know.

They know how to help others, even strangers standing in a Walmart line. They know how to be best friends with each other. They know how to listen to and serve the elderly. They know how to use their imaginations and actually play without electronics. They know how to make people feel welcome and have intelligent conversation with adults and kids alike. They know, without ever being told, how to seek out and befriend the underdog.

So, the next time someone who is ignorant about homeschooling asks me if I worry about my kids' "socialization", I will just think about all these precious things that they know. And I will smile and say, "I doubt we're talking about the same thing."

Yes, it's getting warmer. No, I don't want to see any of your lady bits.

having once lived in florida for several years, i am well aware of the immodesty and general clothing sluttiness that goes on in warmer climates.  what would be considered inappropriate in other states is considered conservative in warmer states.  unfortunately, this concept has spread to the rest of the country.  we are now a nation who dresses their tween-age daughters like streetwalkers.  and apparently, lots of parents are okay with it.

i'll admit, i used to sneak my electric blue mascara (admit it--you're jealous!) out of the house and apply it at school, along with an 80s-sized dose of black eyeliner, ala Madonna.  but despite wanting to dress differently from my parents' expectations, i never ventured into ho-ville.  i just didn't want to wear laura ashley.

i have discovered that clothing retailers have adopted a new lingo for tween and teen clothing.  here's a helpful guide to what that means in real life....say, with shorts.

"shorty" or "mini" shorts--translation: you will be able to see all my lady bits, even whilst standing.  my parents probably bought me the condoms i'm carrying in my purse.

"midi" shorts--translation:  i can point out to my parents that this length is not the shorty shorts, and therefore, more modest.  my parents are fooled, but not the boys, because you can still see my lady bits when i sit down, or do anything but stand.  these shorts are for the parents who are lying to themselves about what their daughter is doing on the side.

"bermuda" or "maxi" shorts--translation:  my mother wants me to have no fun, EVER.  and i am her miserable chicos mini-me.

i see a market niche waiting to be filled, somewhere between future hooker and old-lady-in-training.  you're welcome.

xoxo and all that sappy crap,

mrs. awesome